Miss

Some friends dragged the girlfriend and I to this bar in Metrowalk called Mugen.  Or was it Nugen?  Oh well, it’s there in Metrowalk so I’m sure you’ve seen it.  I told them I don’t like live bands but they dragged us anyway.  Good thing, there was no band that night, just DJs playing some hip-hop and RnB tunes, which was ok.  But then they switched to house.  

First they played Ever After (I was already screaming “Kill me now!”) and then they followed it up with Dove.  And then Dark Beat.  And then some other ancient house tunes from days gone by.  What did I ever do to deserve such punishment?  Do they even know what year we are in now?  Those tracks have been played to death already, I could’ve sworn my ears were bleeding.  I wanted to run to the car, grab some new house CDs and shove them up their ass.  Better judgment prevailed.  Thankfully, after playing about five or six other extremely classic house tracks, they switched back to playing RnB and hip-hop tunes.  I don’t listen to RnB and hip-hop so the tracks were at least refreshing to me.

On the table right beside us were four girls.  They were just dancing in their seats and drinking beer.  My friend dared me to approach them.  He said he’ll pay for my beer if I can pull it off.  He doesn’t know me that well.  Striking up a conversation with girls in a club?  Hah!  Never been a problem.  So he ended up paying for all my beer.  It was ok with the girlfriend so long as she can see me.  

However, one of the girls was just dancing there in her seat, not minding me or her friends at all.  Yep, she was high.  And oh, how I envied her.  What I wouldn’t give for just one tab.  I really miss those days.

Gone

Another day, another petty argument with the girlfriend.  We argue about the smallest things these days.  I’m just so tired.  Anyway, I’m not gonna dwell on that anymore.  I’d rather not. 

Graduation!

With all the things that has been happening in my life, I sometimes forget that I still haven’t graduated.  Of course, that’s just for formality anyway.  I have not neglected to study for the upcoming exams and I have been doing so for the past two months, at least two hours a day.  I’ll pick up the pace in the months to come, of course.

For me, graduation doesn’t really signify anything.  I wouldn’t be licensed to practice anyway, so what’s the point?  I’d rather celebrate during the oath-taking.  Surprisingly, it seems so important to the people around me.  Like it’s a milestone in my life or something.  I already told my parents that I didn’t want to go and that we’d be saving money by not attending the graduation.  They understand.  But the girlfriend wouldn’t let up.  Eventually I gave in.  It’ll be me and her during graduation, and I must admit that I like the idea.  I’d like to bring my parents along as well but they’re being stubborn about my having a serious relationship.  They don’t like her.  But they never liked anyone I introduced to them.  So instead of creating an issue about this whole graduation thing by bringing opposing parties to the event, I picked the girlfriend.  My parents were there during my college graduation anyway.  And they’ll all be with me during the most important moment, which is the oath-taking.  They’ll all be there and they better get along. 

I finally realized that this graduation isn’t for me.  It’s for the people who love me the most. 

Last one, I swear

This blog is turning into a crime scene that I must constantly hide from the girlfriend.  It’s just my luck that she has the sleuthing skills of Sherlock Holmes.  I want to write and write freely but I’m constantly afraid of being discovered.  If and when she discovers this, I’d be in trouble. 

How will I explain to her that despite the fact that I love her terribly and that she’s the one I intend to spend the rest of my life with, I still can’t help but appreciate the beauty of other girls.  It can’t be that bad.  So long as I don’t act upon it, everything should be ok, right?  But the very notion of me liking other girls infuriates her.  Nevermind the fact that I have no intentions of actually engaging in an affair.  

I hate this.

Oh no!

I’m getting sloppy.  I left traces of my identity in my Gmail account when I created a new account.  And when I opened my work computer, lo and behold, I forgot to clear cache, cookies, and history.  I was still signed in to this account.  Unbelievable.  How could I have been so careless?  I’ve been trying my best to keep this Infracted account hidden and I almost threw it all away with because of Gmail’s auto add system.  I won’t let such slips happen again.  I can’t afford to lose this blog.